My Favorite Christmas Song

In honor of the holiday, I wanted to share this song by Faith Hill. The first time I heard it, I didn't even realize it was a Christmas song until the end. Which made me love it even more.

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I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas. Thanks so much for all your support, friendship, love over the last year.

Desperate for Balance

As I crossed the NaNo finish line, my husband clued me on on something: he was feeling neglected. Not just a little neglected, but crisis-neglected. I was . . . a bit shocked.

If you've followed my blog at all or if you care to check out the My Hubby tag, you know two things: 1) my husband is about the most supportive man in the world, and 2) we have next to no interests in common. He will never enjoy spending time with me while I'm writing or reading: he doesn't write, he doesn't read, and he doesn't understand why I like it. I will rarely enjoy spending time with him doing the things he loves: I don't ski, fish, hunt, or understand why he likes it.

For over 12.5 years of marriage, we've made it work anyway.

But it--whatever it was--isn't working anymore.

Last month, I thought everything was right with my marriage. Now I know there need to be changes or things will get very, very wrong.

So I need advice, wise readers. I know a lot of you are married and are very happy. Do you have advice for a writer who wants it all? Is it possible to have a day job, happy husband, content children, relaxing reading and STILL have time to write? How do you do it?

If your spouse isn't a writer, what do you do to make sure you spend time with them? How do you involve them in your writing life (if at all)? If you have two hours of free time after the kids are in bed, you haven't written anything all day, and the spouse is watching a show you don't like . . . what do you do?

I've had exactly one idea to fix this: we're going to learn how to play the guitar together. Hubby has expressed interest and I've always thought it would be fun. Might not have been a priority in my life, but if we both enjoy it . . . well, it has a leg up on every other non-bedroom activity in the world. This, naturally, will take even more time away from writing, but it should provide some forced togetherness with the love of my life, and that ain't bad.

I've pondered whether I can give up writing entirely. Hubby assures me he'll never ask it of me--he just wants some balance. I'm not entirely sure I can give it up without being miserable. I can go long stretches without it, but I need a creative outlet, and I love words. (Lovely, lovely words.) I'm relatively certain I can kill that part of me, but . . . then part of me will be dead. And the years I've spent on my writing will have been wasted. And I don't want that. I still want to be a published writer. Preferably one who can afford to buy her husband a ranch.

So help? Ideas? Advice? Wisdom from on high? Thoughts on where to buy a couple of cheap beginner guitars?

2013 Note: Thanks everyone, for your awesome advice. Though it turns out the problem was too big for advice, I really appreciate the help.

Late to the "And You Are...?" blog hop

I didn't even see Emily King's and Tammy Theriault's blog hop until today, but I wanted to play anyway, so here I am. :)


1. How many speeding tickets have you gotten?

Um... none? I was pulled over for speeding once and given a warning because I was new to the area. Now ask me how many accidents I've caused. Uh, actually, never mind. Don't ask.

2. Can you pitch a tent?

Yes. But why, when I have a husband to do it for me? :)

3. What was your worst vacation ever?

First family reunion with the new in-laws. We left the pretty lake and drove 3 hours one way to take a 15-minute tour of a house carved into a rock. The tour guide wasn't even all that good.

4. What was the last thing you bought over $100?
Smart phone. Oh, how I love it! *Wonders if it was really over $100* *Decides that yes, yes it was*

5. We're handing you the keys to what?

Sadly, I don't care much. I want it fuel-efficient, with comfy seats, power windows-and-stuff, sunroof, and approved by hubby.

6. What was the last meal you cooked that made even you sick?

Well, I made brownies when I was about 12 that had waaay too much salt in them. Other than that, I eat just about anything, so it's hard to make something that makes me sick. :) I did get food poisoning at a restaurant, once, though....

7. Fill in the blank: Oh my gosh! Becky, look at her butt! It is so big. She looks like ____?
I used to before I decided to start using my gym membership!

8. What was your first car?
The one my husband had when we got married. :)

9. Your best friend falls and gets hurt. Do you ask if he/she's okay or laugh first?

Smile first, then concern face (quick, before she can see), then laugh later. Together.

10. What's the worst song ever?

All I Wanna Do is Make Love to You by Heart. I mean, seriously? You're in love with someone else and you think there's anything right about sleeping with a random stranger? Poor poor tortured soul. (Well, obviously not tortured enough.) Worse? I went back to look up the artist and read through the lyrics again. And now I know she slept with him because the man she loved couldn't give her a baby. So now she's completely betrayed two men. *shudders*

So did you play? Wanna join late so I'm not the last one on the list?

I Won NaNo!

I'd love to tell you all about NaNo this month, but I have no brain cells left to create more words today. So see this picture instead:

See me chase the line all month? TIRED!

This is how the calendar looked--green are days I wrote at least 1667. Yellow are for when I fell short of that. Orange is for the day I wrote 35 words. :) I think there was a different color of green for really, really awesome word-count days, but I never got one of those, so I don't know.

Then when I thought I was done, it turned out I was 200 words short and I had to sit down and pound some out before I could certify. TIRED!

And now I need to go figure out which three of the awesome Pitch Wars mentors might most like the novel I'm querying. Wish me luck!

Pitch Wars!!!

I'm still struggling through NaNo, as you can see in my sidebar. I'm a little behind, but I'm catching up. I can do this!

Of course, it's made harder when awesome contests pop up toward the end of the month. The good news is that November 26 is just the start of the information-gathering stage. December 5 is when the real fun starts.

It's....

Go here for full deets

This is another awesome contest by the inestimable Brenda Drake. It's gonna be awesome. Well, I hope. There's also a chance I'll be outta-luck when none of the mentors pick me. I'm just not gonna think about that. Of COURSE the mentors will love me! They'll be fighting over me! (It could happen.)

So what are you doing for Thanksgiving?

It's Captcha Craptcha Day!

I had to join this blogfest, too, mainly because it's really easy to just say:

Turn the captcha off on your blog! Blogger has wonderful spam filters that snag all the stupid spammers and ad-bombers in comments and that don't require me to stand on my head while chewing gum and auditioning for Rain Dance. It's annoying for me to compose a brilliant blog comment, click submit, and then have to spend 2 minutes puzzling through 5 rounds of captcha codes just to justify the 30 seconds I spent composing said comment. (Okay, that's an exaggeration. Sometimes my comments only take 5 seconds to compose.)

Go here for instructions to turn the dang captcha code off.

That is all.

Back to NaNo. (Which really needs its own hate day.)

UPDATE: Shelly's post today included a TED talk from one of the guys responsible for the Captcha codes--and some of them are helping to digitalize books. He doesn't mention the stupid blurry pics of numbers, but he's really doing some amazing things with the hours we're all spending puzzling those codes out. Also, check out Duolingo. And watch the video (I've never met a TED talk I didn't like):

Thanksgiving Blog Hop

I'm a sucker for just about anything Brenda Drake does these days. She has tons of awesome contests and is an all-around awesome person. I am in awe of her awesomeness. Truly.

So when she starts a Thanksgiving Blog Hop during the month when all my creativity (and some I'm siphoning from my kids as they sleep) is going to NaNoWriMo, I figure this is a no-brainer.

And the first thing I'm thankful for are online friends, like Brenda, who critique my stories and queries, talk me off of ledges, kick my butt for NaNo, and are just all-around awesome. I'd list them all, but I'd forget someone and that would ruin it. Basically, if you're reading this: thanks. :)